Being 3 comes with alot of rough times…alot. BUT, it has so many great moments that help make those times a little more bearable!
David has been to Japan (Schapayan as Graceyn says) twice since April and is now in New York. It has been hard on Graceyn for daddy to be gone so much but I really believe God is using this time to train her little heart. She is learning what it’s like to serve others; have compassion on them; give up time with family to show God’s love to people we don’t even know. She is learning about sacrifice and hard work. She is most importantly learning (we hope) about God’s unfathomable love and grace! We have seen Graceyn’s sinful heart alot lately…mainly at bedtime when disobedience, disrespect, and plain old defiance run rampant. And today, starting this morning, I begged God for His grace at bedtime. I am at the point where I HATE bedtime and I HATE that I hate it. But I dread it every night. And I kind of think Graceyn knows that and dreads it as well. Tonight…we experienced GRACE!!! I reminded her that she would have to go to bed early because letting her stay up late wasn’t helping her make good choices at bedtime. She of course didn’t like that idea but she didn’t fight it at all and was in bed, silent, by 7:20. I am thankful. Today I also read part of a book about how we need to lavish our children with the love of Jesus. It’s about grace filled parenting. And I need to can’t wait to read it cover to cover. The author reminds us that we cannot parent simply to make our children obey. Discipline cannot be our focus. Our focus must be Jesus. If only my focus was Jesus every day…maybe my own heart would not be as stubborn at bedtime. Because I do know that her fits are not entirely her fault. By the end of the day I am tired and ready for her to wind down. She isn’t. So my focus needs to be on Jesus…I need to start our routine earlier so she can have more time that she desperately needs. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll start to enjoy bedtime again. Tonight gave me a glimpse of hope 
On a lighter note…MUCH lighter…I love this girl so much! Her spirit is so full of energy, a true high spirited child. She is passionate about every emotion and I hope to embrace that more and more as I learn more about her little personality. My prayer is that I will not squelch that spirit but help her learn how to express it and then enjoy it as her mom. When David learned that he would be heading to New York we decided to collect some stuffed animals for the team to distribute to children who had lost their things in the flood. Of course I wanted Graceyn to be involved. When we first chatted about it, she was NOT happy with this idea because ALL of her stuffed animals were “special to me” and she didn’t like the idea of giving ANY of them away. I was a little annoyed at this selfish attitude but quickly reminded myself that she is only 3 years old and this is the time to teach selflessness, not expect it to come naturally. And really…does it EVER come naturally? Not for me! So why would I expect it from her? Anyway, after we talked for awhile I decided to drop it and revisit the topic another time. A day or 2 later, we were walking with a friend, and she brought it up saying that she was going to give some of her stuffed animals to the children in New York. When we got home, she went up to her room, picked several out, and excitedly walked them down to her daddy. Of course she does say that those aren’t special ones so she can give them away But we’ll take it!
Her spirit shows in so many ways in our daily lives. If she’s hurt, she cries loudly. If she’s excited, she’s jumping up and down squealing. If she’s sad she is VERY sad. If she’s mad, she’s hitting or screaming. If she’s concerned about someone or something she does everything she can to take care of it. She’s compassionate and loves to help other people. She’s animated when she talks. She is our girl and we love her.
And just because I loved it…we were at the farmers’ market with a friend who offered to share some zucchini that she was buying. As we were putting a few into our bag to take home, Graceyn bursts into tears and says, “No! I want my own zaqueenie!” How could I not laugh?!
And just because I know posts are no fun without pictures these are from sometime this summer when we went to pick blueberries with our friends…
